In the beginning...

there were many commandments, and the commandments all involved much paperwork and wailing and gnashing of teeth, and verily there were many sets of fingerprints generated and rejected, yea unto the 8th or 9th iteration of such. And the hands of this hardworking, bundle-toting, garage-sale implementing, dirt-scrabbling, hand-washing woman were nearly devoid of usable fingerprints, though she had been fingerprinted many times since entering the health care profession, none of which had borne fruit nor yielded up evidence of any wrongdoing (for Pete's sake, I've never even had a traffic ticket except for in Montana where it's not even a moving violation, just a resource conservation violation for driving too fast, and well worth the $5 for the privilege of driving as fast as you want in the absence of posted speed limits. But I digress...).

And it came to pass that yet another set was required of her to obtain a "preceptor registration" from the state of Alaska, though she had already obtained an R.N. license from that state, with it's multiplicity of requirements and proofs that might indicate to the unknowing that there is, in fact, a GLUT of R.N.s already practicing in said state. Two previous sets of fingerprints sent to Alaska had failed to pass muster, the first one when the entire contents of the application envelope having apparently swum to Anchorage unaided by boat or other conveyance; the second set (and an additional $15 fee for making them) were rejected by the FBI for poor quality. The fingerprints, not the fee.

Now, those fingerprints (did I say that which, in all the many other times I've been fingerprinted have never revealed any crime sprees?) are exactly what my fingertips look like. Worn down. Wrinkled. Old. Well used. No amount of lotion will change that. One could even venture to say that they are pretty unique, due to the above-mentioned characteristics. Just GO with them, FBI! They will NOT GET ANY BETTER! Tomorrow I go off to the Sheriff's office to have the nice lady ink another set, and that is really the only hurdle I have left to being able to do this clinical in Alaska. Stay tuned for more progress reports, and if all goes well, I'll be on a plane heading north early in the day of May 21, 2010.